Can a godly person marry an adulterer?

Marriage is a covenant, a sacred bond established by God to reflect His love and faithfulness. But what happens when that bond is broken by adultery? God’s Word provides a complex yet deeply insightful answer. At first glance, it may seem contradictory for God to allow divorce in cases of adultery (Matthew 19:9) while asking Hosea to marry Gomer, a prostitute, and remain faithful to her despite her infidelity (Hosea 1:2). But when we explore these teachings in the light of God’s nature, we see a consistent message of love, justice, and forgiveness.

Adultery shatters trust, leaving wounds that seem irreparable. God, in His justice, permitted divorce in such cases, acknowledging the pain and betrayal caused by unfaithfulness. Yet, this is not His ideal. From the beginning, God intended marriage to be an unbreakable covenant (Genesis 2:24). Jesus emphasised this when He explained that Moses permitted divorce only because of humanity’s hard-heartedness, not as God’s perfect will (Matthew 19:8). The higher standard is clear: marriage is meant to endure, reflecting God’s unwavering commitment to His people.

But then, there is Hosea. What could be more illogical than God asking a prophet to marry a woman who would betray him? Hosea’s story was not just about a man and a woman; it was a living parable of God’s relationship with Israel. Despite Israel’s repeated spiritual adultery—turning to idols and forsaking God—He remained faithful. Hosea’s painful journey with Gomer illustrates this divine love that chooses to forgive and restore. God’s ways often defy human logic, calling us to mirror His boundless grace, even in the face of betrayal.

When Jesus said, "Anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart" (Matthew 5:28), He raised the bar for understanding sin. Adultery is not merely a physical act; it begins in the heart. This teaching leaves no room for self-righteousness, as it reveals that all have fallen short of God’s standard. If adultery begins with a lustful thought, then every heart needs cleansing and renewal. This realisation shifts the focus from condemnation to compassion, urging us to seek God’s grace for ourselves and extend it to others.

Forgiveness is the heartbeat of the gospel. While the pain of adultery is undeniable, God calls us to forgive as we have been forgiven (Ephesians 4:32). This does not mean overlooking sin or pretending it never happened, but it does mean releasing the offender from the debt of their wrong and seeking restoration if repentance is present. Forgiveness is not about excusing sin, but reflecting God’s character and trusting Him to heal the brokenness.

Hosea’s obedience reminds us that God’s commands often transcend human reasoning. Just as Hosea was called to love Gomer unconditionally, we too may be called to love and forgive in ways that defy our sense of justice. This is not weakness but strength—born of God’s Spirit and rooted in His love. God’s love is not logical; it is redemptive.

Does this mean that every broken marriage must end in reconciliation? Not necessarily. God permits divorce in certain situations, recognising the reality of sin’s damage. Yet, He also invites us to pursue His higher calling of forgiveness and restoration whenever possible. Each situation is unique, and discernment is needed to align our actions with His will.

For those who have been wounded by infidelity, Hosea’s story offers hope. God’s love is greater than our failures, and His grace is sufficient to redeem even the most broken relationships. And for those who have fallen into adultery—whether in action or thought—there is no sin too great for God’s forgiveness. His mercy is new every morning (Lamentations 3:22-23), and His arms are always open to the repentant heart.

As we navigate life’s challenges, including the painful realities of broken relationships, may we always remember the One who loved us while we were yet sinners (Romans 5:8). His example calls us to love, forgive, and extend grace in ways that reflect His heart. In a world marred by sin, forgiveness shines as the ultimate expression of God’s love.